When You’ve Lost Your Dream

There was a time in my life where I couldn’t hear, see or sense God. I would pray and it was as if the heavens were brass.

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I thought my life would turn out one way and here I was, recovering from the aftermath of a difficult pregnancy, overweight, post partum, sleep deprived because my son was colic and unhappy.

I can’t tell you how hard life was for me back then. I would look around at my friends who were happy and pursuing their dreams.

But I wasn’t. I was stuck in a new reality that I did not want.

I kept asking God where He was. He didn’t seem like He was with me at all. I felt isolated and alone.

When we are in a difficult season of life, we think it will last forever.

My friends did their best to try and encourage me by saying, God is not over with me yet and He had a great plan for my life.

While I whispered under my breath, yeah right. I couldn’t see it. I felt as if God abandoned me.

I was miserable.

Instead of getting better, I got bitter. I was angry and I was envious of others who were living their lives the way I wished I could.

I honestly did not believe I would ever dream again.

I am happy to report I am dreaming again. I’m dreaming God’s dream for me before I came to earth.

You are probably wondering how long it took to get to this point. The answer is a decade. It was only up until recently I was able to dream again.

So for those of you who are raising babies, don’t know what your dreams are, feel really discouraged and inadequate, this is for you:

God has a plan for your life. He hasn’t given up on you. He hasn’t forgotten you. He hasn’t abandoned you. He loves you passionately. You are in a season right now. It won’t last forever. He is growing you in the process. Keep your eyes on Him, no matter what and He will see you through. You will dream again.

Have you stopped dreaming? Do you think God has forgotten you?

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  • http://www.heidikreider.com/ Heidi Kreider

    You are one of the most beautiful writers I know. ;)

    • http://www.ordinaryservant.com/ Pilar Arsenec

      So are you my sister, so are you. Thank you. :)

  • Tara

    “I’m dreaming God’s dream for me before I came to earth.”. Oh, Pilar, what a beautiful sentence, and what a beautiful idea. Thank you for sharing it, and for reminding us to keep seeking that dream, even when the dream AND it’s Creator seem far away.

    • http://www.ordinaryservant.com/ Pilar Arsenec

      Tara, you are a lovely person and I’m grateful to have met you and get to know you more and more. Thanks for reading and commenting. :)

  • Jennifer Haston

    I loved this post, I am such a supporter of dreams. I would love to hear more about your dreams and goals and where you feel God is leading you these days. Keep writing!

    • http://www.ordinaryservant.com/ Pilar Arsenec

      Thank you, Jennifer. You are very sweet. Thanks for your kind words, encouragement and feedback. I will share more, so please come back. :)

  • http://twitter.com/citrus_sunshine Andrea Ward

    I didn’t know other mothers felt this way! Thank you so much for the encouragement.

    • http://www.ordinaryservant.com/ Pilar Arsenec

      My pleasure friend. It’s nice seeing you here. :)