Tag Archives: Shame

The Art of Disguise

By Ordinary Servant | Published June 1, 2015

Sometimes I think life is one big masquerade. Everyone is playing a different character and acting out their prospective roles. Some have mastered the art of disguise better than others.

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Some people are good at projecting an image, by dressing a certain way, splashing on cologne, wearing designer sun glasses, and driving nice cars.

They look successful on the outside; flashing their pearly whites evidenced by their barrage of selfies on social media.

However, nothing can disguise a tormented soul, a troubled mind, a broken heart, or the scars of an abusive past. The perpetual pain they live with day after day, hoping, longing and praying for it to go away.

They don’t want their secret being known. So they disguise their pain and shame for fear of being found out. They want to maintain their image by appearing to have it all together.

Those preserving their image, are the ones that are the loneliest and most isolated and disconnected because they avoid, hide, mask and disguise their pain, instead of facing it.

If they would risk being vulnerable, they would be surprised to see they are not alone, and that many walking around are in the same predicament.

Life has a way of bringing us to a point where the truth reveals itself, no matter how much you try to hide behind make up, jewelry, clothes or perfume.

You can only hide for so long, before the stench of what is shattered and broken inside manifests. It’s best to address it and heal from that which is provoking you to adopt the art of disguise before it wreaks havoc upon your life.

Are you hiding behind a mask, or an image you want to portray to everyone around you? Are you playing a role, but hurting inside? Let’s talk about it in the comment section below.

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The Stigma of Shame

By Ordinary Servant | Published May 4, 2015

I have been doing a study on shame. It’s been something I have been avoiding to delve into for quite some time. Why? Well, who really wants to start digging up old doo-doo.

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Shame is one of those things you would rather just hide, ignore or bury, than have to face or look at. Shame is much more pervasive than guilt.

The stigma of shame is something humanity struggles with, if some realize it or not. We all mask it differently. God forbid we feel naked or exposed… that will only bring about more feelings of shame.

Some people think it is guilt they are feeling or struggling with, when in actuality it is shame. Shame is deeper and stems from messages you were told as a child. Shame is connected with self loathing and disgust of one self.

Those who have suffered from sexual abuse, carry the stigma of shame in its most palatable form.

So what do we do once we know that shame is pretty much controlling and navigating our existence? Well, we delve right into the abyss and unravel its mysteries.

There is a passage of Scripture that I always identified with, the story of the man with a withered hand. (Mark 3:3) This man walked around hiding his hand, until Jesus who had compassion, healed him on the Sabbath. He told him to stretch forth his hand and he was instantly healed.

Sometimes we have to risk exposure in order to heal. Yes, it is humiliating at first, just as it was for the man with the shriveled hand. He had to expose it in front of everyone in the Synagogue. He had to demonstrate courage to overcome his shame and allow Jesus to heal him.

It’s sort of like the pus of an infection, if you keep covering it, it will only get worse. You have to expose and clean it, in order for it to heal. Same applies to the inner infection of shame.

If you struggle with shame, know that you aren’t alone. If you desire to heal, then you must be willing to risk and face the Goliath in your life. Once you do, you will experience freedom. This is something I’m striving for and want in my life.

Do you struggle from shame? When was  your earliest recollection?

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