Category Archives: blogging
Are You Playing The “Game”?
It is said, life is a game.
The pieces on a chessboard are people maneuvering themselves into strategic positions to win.
The “game” is played on the streets as well as on the internet.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
I’ve worked in Corporate America for almost 30 years, and there are unspoken rules there too.
You play the “game” right, you win.
You play it wrong, you lose.
Truth be told, I hate playing games.
I’ve always had a difficult time following a crowd or being part of a clique. I’ve never participated, and still don’t.
I’m not antisocial. I’m just not into pretenses.
Which is probably why I frown upon words like, “community” and “tribe”. It reminds me of a gang mentality.
Gangs are racist and discriminatory. They only accept people who are like them.
If you follow, you are accepted. If you say and do all the right things, you are in. If you don’t, you are cut off.
Social media is a slippery slope.
Most try to climb the ranks like a gangster.
They become friends with you on Facebook or follow you on Twitter, with an agenda. In the hopes that you will help them, but never with the intention of getting to know you.
It’s all about what you can do for them. How you can help them succeed or get ahead.
You see, it’s hardly about “community”.
Everyone follows and joins the bandwagon. They jump in head first to climb the ladder of fame.
The second you say “no” to something they want, you can best believe, they will unfriend or unfollow you in a heartbeat.
You no longer have any use for them, because you were just a “tool” to begin with.
Eventually, word gets around in the so-called “community” and you are exiled.
I don’t know about you, but I am not interested in following the sheep or rather, herd mentality.
I don’t need people’s favors to get ahead. If God has something for me, then it’s for me.
As with everything in my life, nothing was handed to me on a silver platter. I had to work hard and earn the right to have whatever I have today.
There are no political hand-outs or favors in my world.
I’m glad because I don’t have an “entitlement” mentality that most people have. I don’t walk around looking for ways on how people can help me or ask for favors.
Half of these people, who are in the same “community”, are landing positions they aren’t even qualified for. They got it by playing the “game”, rubbing elbows and doing favors.
When it comes to art, homie don’t play that.
My creativity came from God and I won’t be exploiting it any time soon.
I don’t subscribe to the “I’ll scratch your back, if you’ll scratch mine” mentality.
You can call it pride if you’d like, but I’m not stooping that low to get ahead, even if it means walking alone.
If I get anywhere with anything I pursue, it will be by the grace of God mixed with my sacrifice, effort and hard work.
Where do you stand on this matter? Are you buying into the dream their selling you?
A Forgotten Ministry
Remember them that are in bonds, as bound with them;and them which suffer adversity, as being yourselves also in the body.
Hebrews 13:3
Courtesy of Creative Commons
A couple of weeks ago, I came across an article about a new book that was released, Black is the Day, Black is the Night by Amy Elkins.
This article fascinated me. Amy Elkins corresponded with five male inmates on death row, which lead to her book of remarkable photographs. She expresses their story in an artistic way.
I have been studying about solitary confinement and prison life for awhile now.
Our entire prison and justice system baffles and troubles me. I have a burden for those who are incarcerated.
Those who have been locked up, forgotten about by family and so-called friends as if they no longer exist.
Let me share an excerpt by Amy Elkins:
“A system that uses long-term solitary confinement and capital punishment is broken. Housing someone in infinite isolation has been proven to be hugely damaging to one’s psychological and physical state. This type of isolation breeds behavioral and emotional imbalances that are bound to cause most to remain in a perpetual state of anxiety, depression and anger. Which means they are set up for failure. There is absolutely no way to rehabilitate in such conditions. But clearly rehabilitation isn’t what they have in mind.
I have written with one man in particular who has served 20 years in solitary confinement as part of a Life Without Parole (LWOP) sentence for a non-murder related crime he committed aged 16. He has written about going years talking through concrete walls without ever seeing the men he holds daily conversations with. He spends nearly 23 hours a day in a small cell by himself and when he is let out, he is shackled and permitted to exercise in a slightly larger room by himself for an hour. How he’s gone 20 years in these conditions and not gone completely mad is mind blowing.”
I have been writing to inmates off and on now for years. You have no idea how happy it makes them to receive letters.
While sitting in their 6 x 9 to 8 x 10 feet cell, day in and day out, for 22 or 23 hours a day, with no hope of physical contact with anyone other than a correctional officer.
They describe solitary confinement or death row as hell on earth.
You may be thinking, these prisoners are criminals, they deserve what they get. They took a life or whatever, so they need to pay for what they did.
But think about it, how will they ever rehabilitate in a barbaric system like solitary confinement or capital punishment?
The system is flawed.
The Bible admonishes us not to forget about those who are in prison.
Perhaps you don’t want to visit a prison. That is understandable. It’s not for everyone.
But, if you have a burden, you could write to an inmate or two.
Some churches even have a prison ministry. If you a part of or member of a church, you may be able to get involved in their pen pal ministry.
If not, you can do it on your own; just Google inmate pen pal sites and choose an inmate to write to.
It’s best to write to the same sex, however, you may discover you identify and have a burden for someone of the opposite sex.
It is important to be clear about your position and intention in your first letter to them, so they know where you stand. Setting boundaries from the beginning is vital.
They will respect your wishes because all they desire is to be able to communicate with someone, anyone.
Believe it or not, the majority do not receive letters from anyone.
If you are concerned about your safety or of your family, you can always use an alias and rent a P.O. Box.
I highly suggest only using a P.O. Box.
If you are going to begin writing to an inmate, the most important thing to remember is consistency is key.
If you believe you won’t be able to be consistent for whatever reason, it is best not to start.
The reason why I say this, is because it will only result in another let down and disappointment for them.
They are already at a loss and suffer from hopelessness.
The only thing they look forward to is receiving letters.
If you decide to start, please make sure you can stick with it.
Writing to those in prison is a forgotten ministry, but is one of the best ways to demonstrate God’s love in action.
Is this something you would be interested in doing? Do you have any questions or concerns? If so, please comment below.
By The Word Of Our Testimony
“And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the Word of their testimony.” Revelation 12:11
Courtesy of Creative Commons
What makes Jesus real to others? Is it what we say? What we do? How do the unsaved come to believe Jesus is real?
Revelation 12:11 says, it is by our testimony.
When I think about my testimony, I cringe.
Do I really want to tell others what I have done and been through?
Truth be told, I never share my testimony. I may share bits and pieces of it, here and there, but I never get around to actually telling people what God has delivered me from.
I remember when a close friend of mine who is a missionary introduced me to other missionaries. She began telling them a little bit about my testimony and I was mortified. She saw the expression on my face and pulled me aside to apologize. I told her I wasn’t comfortable sharing my story with others, whether they are Christians or not.
I am not comfortable sharing my past, which is why I don’t share my testimony.
Recently, I listened to a message where a pastor said, “God did not deliver you for yourself. He did not deliver you, so that you could live a comfortable life, sitting on your sofa, eating popcorn. He delivered you so that you can go tell others about what Jesus has done for you, so that others may believe.”
Boy, did I feel convicted.
All these years, I have been sitting on my testimony because I don’t want to be judged and criticized by others.
Yes, God has delivered me of much, but yet, I want to tuck it away somewhere, go on with my life and forget about it.
We can continue to use prescriptions and formulas to bring others to Christ. We can also act like we have it figured out and attempt to do everything with our own reasoning.
However, as you can see from the above verse, it isn’t by our logical antidotes or persuasive words that brings others to the saving knowledge of Jesus Christ.
It is by the Holy Spirit, the blood of the Lamb, and the word of our testimony.
This is God’s prescription.
The real question is, will we continue to follow our own way or do it His way?
Do you also find it hard to share you testimony?
He Loves To Hear Our Hearts
Life is busy. We are constantly running and trying keep up with the clock.
At end of the day, we are exhausted. We head to sleep, only to wake up and do it all over again the next day.
When do we stop and spend time with God?
Courtesy of Creative Commons
The other day I was speaking to a close friend of mine. I asked her this question, “How do we develop intimacy with God?”
My friend is in full time ministry and has been following the Lord consistently for many years.
She responded, “By spending time with Him. It’s in having a relationship with Him, that intimacy grows.”
It’s the same as any earthly relationship. If we don’t spend time with a friend or spouse, we won’t get to know them.
The same applies to our Heavenly Father. If we don’t stop and spend time with Him, we won’t get to know Him.
There was a time I tried to build my faith by reading books, attending every church service, going to conferences and serving in ministry.
I thought by “doing” all these things, my faith and intimacy would somehow grow.
I was wrong.
It is not by our might or power, it is by His Spirit. It is God who changes us from the inside out by spending time and getting to know Him.
It’s by setting aside time every day to read His Word, pray and wait on Him.
When we develop this discipline, we begin to grow in intimacy with Him.
It isn’t by our doing, works or ministry that changes us or develops our faith. It is God who does the work in our hearts through the Holy Spirit.
He doesn’t want us doing anything for Him, He wants us and our time.
He loves to hear our hearts.
Has He been hearing from yours lately?
Mad Faith
You’re probably wondering why am I using the word “mad” in connection to “faith”.
The word “mad” is commonly used in New York City. The urban dictionary defines “mad” as “extreme” or “a lot”.
I decided to connect the two; mad faith.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
I’ve been thinking madly about faith. What makes one have more faith than another, and that sort of thing.
It’s a mystery.
My desire has been ever increasing for my faith to be authentic.
In Christendom, I see many chasing after signs, wonders, miracles and manifestations, to the point of idolatry.
I’m not judging, but merely making an observation.
Truthfully, I used to be one of those people. I would chase after God here, there and everywhere.
I was seeking some kind of sign or experience and chasing after Him as if He couldn’t be found.
Frankly, I had it all wrong.
It sort of reminds me of Moses, when He went up to the mountain to get the Ten Commandments and left the people behind. In time, they all started making physical idols to worship instead of worshipping the God who miraculously parted the Red Sea and delivered them from the Egyptians.
What is it in us that inclines us to chase after other gods, instead of Him? Why are we restless and unsettled in our faith? Why must we chase after experiences? Why isn’t Jesus enough?
These are the questions which gnaw at me daily. I don’t have the answers. All I know is that I’ve already tried it all. I’ve traveled around the world in search of Him.
I am certain of this, it is not by signs and wonders that our faith increases, not in the least. I tell you this from personal experience. This doesn’t deepen our faith.
One thing that does though, is adversity.
My faith was strengthened, when I shook with fear, felt hopeless, thinking God wasn’t going to deliver me out of something, and He did.
To me, that’s miraculous. Not manifestations of angel feathers, gems or gold dust appearing at some gathering, where the attention turns to man and not God.
This is where the confusion begins. Everyone starts worshiping and idolizing the creation instead of the Creator. The credit for these so-called manifestations becomes attributed to man, instead of God. If something is going to take the focus or pull you away from God, you should run the other direction and don’t look back.
I’m sharing what I’ve gleaned from all of the mistakes I’ve made in my life.
I’m not claiming to be an expert or have it right. I’ll be the first to tell you I don’t have all the answers. All I know is my heart longs for the authentic. For the living God of this universe to be real and present in my life.
I don’t want my desire for signs, wonders, miracles and manifestations to take precedence over Him. He already gave and did it all by dying on the Cross for me, what more do I want?
I want to have mad faith which is undeniable and unshakeable. I want to experience more of His love and presence in my life. Not experiences, sensations, imitations or cheap substitutes. The real deal.
What about you?
Bobbing and Weaving
After taking a few boxing classes for fun at NYSC from an instructor named Santana. One day I looked him in the eye and said, “I’m going to become a professional boxer now, goodbye.” He stood there dumbfounded.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
I remember the day I walked into Gleason’s Boxing gym for the first time. It was in 1998 and at the time, the majority of boxers were male.
They all gawked at me as I strode in wearing my leopard print tights which matched my wild and untamed hair. I was quite a sight.
I walked holding my head high and ready to conquer the boxing world.
Back then Gleason’s was different than it is today. The air was musky and hung with sweat, the windows were foggy, everything seemed old and worn.
It was an environment I was neither familiar with or exposed to in my life.
So there I was, Ms. Middle Class amongst those who were rough and lived in underprivileged neighborhoods.
However, nothing was going to stop me. I was determined to prove myself as a female boxer.
I remember the day my trainer decided to have me spar with some dude. There were no female boxers around.
I got in the ring, started moving around and practicing my jab. My trainer yelling for me to bob and weave. So I started bobbing and weaving. Then I tried doing an uppercut. I loved those upper cuts, but I wasn’t able to get in close enough to do it.
I began feeling winded. Thankfully, the bell rang because I was dying of thirst. I opened my mouth, for my trainer to give me water. He squirts a little water and tells me to spit it out. I looked at him as if he was out of his mind. There was no way I was going to spit it out. I swallowed it.
The bell rang again. I hesitated. I was exhausted and wanted to stop. The next thing I know, I was keeling over.
I didn’t have my guard up and the guy landed a punch to my liver. There are no words to describe the level of pain.
I learned a valuable lesson that day. One I will never forget. Defense is everything. In the ring and in life. When my guard was down, there was an opening for him to hit me.
I was out of breath, thirsty and my movements were sluggish. My opponent took complete advantage of the situation.
While reflecting back on this incident, I realized the enemy of our souls does the same. He waits for an opening to lodge his onslaughts and attacks on us. If we’re are open, tired or unguarded, he will catch us by surprise which will leave us reeling.
In 1 Peter 5:8 it says, “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour,” and Luke 21:34 says, “And take heed to yourselves, lest at any time your hearts be overcharged with surfeiting, and drunkenness, and cares of this life, and so that day come upon you unawares.”
We can’t let him catch us off guard. We have to keep our defenses up by reading the Word and praying. We need to practice bobbing and weaving daily.
Thankfully, we have the best trainer, the Holy Spirit and the best corner man, Jesus Christ.
We are guaranteed to win and promised the victory!
Have you been bobbing and weaving lately?
Every Action Has A Reaction
A long time ago, I used to think my actions didn’t effect others. I was single, living in my own world and doing my own thing.
Unfortunately, being single didn’t allow me the ability to see myself clearly. It was when I got married, I was able to see choices, decisions and actions have repercussions and consequences, not only to myself, but to others as well.
Courtesy of Creative Commons – alicemariedesign
This was a huge pill for me to swallow and accept. We go along with our lives when we are alone, thinking we can do whatever we want, say whatever we want and it’s nobody else’s business or concern.
The world is our oyster.
However, this is living in a bubble or fantasy world, which is self-centered and self-absorbed.
The truth is every action has a reaction.
There is no getting around it, whether you are married or single, whether you want to believe it or not, your actions and choices effect everyone around you.
It’s like a pebble hitting the surface of water, you see the ripple effect. The same occurs with us; our choices are like pebbles and our actions cause rippling effects.
This is why we have to be careful to choose wisely because some actions are irreversible. The damaging effects of one wrong choice can destroy more than you bargained for.
For instance, a family member who continually betrays you by speaking negatively about you behind your back with other family members, thinking it will never get back to you.
But it always does, doesn’t it? Some way, somehow, the information finds its way back to the person.
Once this occurs, the damage is done, because you can never look at that family member the same way again. A seed of distrust is planted and with each repetitive instance, the seed of distrust continues to germinate and grow.
Yes, one can forgive and move on, but the trust and respect needed for a good and healthy relationship is broken and lost.
Has this ever been your experience? Can you recall a time when this applied in your life?
Microwavable Art
Recently, I’ve become bored with blogs. I find myself yawning as I read blog posts by popular bloggers. Yes, even bloggers with huge followings.
I started to think about why I’ve become bored with their writing and blogs.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
While reading this morning’s post by Seth Godin (which sparked this post), he mentions, “everyone is making noise and there is generally useless stuff being written.”
What I call “useless stuff” is microwavable or recyclable writing.
There is just so much I can read about “Five ways to do this” and “Seven ways to do that”.
Reading their blogs is like eating stale bread. It is bland, boring and dull.
There is no originality anymore. Forgive me if I sound like a snob, I don’t mean to.
Who knows, perhaps it’s just me… maybe following popular blogs, bloggers or blogging isn’t for me.
I don’t want to read mediocre writing anymore. My time is precious and whatever I ingest, I want it to be substantive. Not some cheap substitute for the real thing.
Have you ever wondered what happened to the art in the 1500, 1600 and 1700’s?
Such as, Mozart, Beethoven and Shakespeare?
Where did the caliber of art go?
There was none of the microwavable art that we see today.
Artists respected art. Now artists prostitute and exploit art for their own gain or recognition.
The artists of the past were givers, not takers.
Today everyone wants in on the game. They want a piece of the pie. It’s all about them.
There is no respect for art anymore. Just a bunch of recyclable trash that does not edify anyone.
Artists need to recognize they have a responsibility to humanity to be good stewards of art and the gifts God blesses them with.
Do you agree or disagree and why?
What Was This Year Like For You?
If I were to think of one word that described this year for me, it would be change.
This year was jam packed with changes, big and small. There were a lot of adjustments I had to make on account of all the changes too.
Courtesy of Creative Commons
Change has never been an easy thing for me. So this year was a real challenge on multiple levels, but it stretched me and my faith.
During the summer months, I was filled with angst and anxiety. I hadn’t felt so nervous in a long time. It was affecting my sleep, my job and my life. It took everything in me to trust the Lord through a shaky and unstable time. I wasn’t sure what was going to happen and I confess, I was scared.
All I could do was talk to God and ask Him to help me. I am happy to report that He got me through the tough time and turned it around for good.
This year through all the influx of change, I managed to accomplish a lot. I couldn’t do it without the Lord and the support of the man He blessed me with.
There is a saying that behind every great man is a good woman, but I say this, that behind every happy wife is a great husband.
I can attest, I have the best husband in the world. It’s not to boast or brag, I’m just telling the truth and paying tribute.
I realize what I have been given is more than gifts under a tree. We mustn’t take for granted the blessings of those we love, a roof over our heads, food in our stomachs, and clothing on our backs.
The fact that we have Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith. He is the greatest gift of all.
I’m grateful for what I have. I give thanks unto God for being in my right mind, for good health, for my husband and children, family, friends, my job and colleagues.
I think about those who are in prison, those who are hungry, those who are sick, those who have lost family members, parents who have missing children, those who are homeless, the list goes on.
I can find a hundred things to complain about, but when I look around me, I give thanks for what the Lord has done in my life and the ability He gives me to accomplish so much.
So here is to a spectacular 2014. I pray 2014 is the best year yet, for all of us.
Happy New Year!
How was this year for you?
Do You Gossip?
I find around the holiday’s people tend to engage in gossip more than usual. Sometimes the holiday’s brings the worst out of some people.
Gossipers preface what they have to say with, “Promise you won’t say anything…”
Courtesy of Creative Commons
But, do they know, that the information will eventually get back to the person their gossiping about?
When I get wind of someone who has gossiped behind my back, while smiling at my face, I want very little to do with them. I honestly do not care if they are family either.
If a so-called family member or friend has the audacity to talk garbage about me (or those I love) behind my back, I want nothing to do with them.
I forgive them, but I keep it moving. Life is too short to be around those who speak ill of you.
I’ve come to the conclusion that those who engage in gossip, don’t have your best interest in mind. They only care about themselves and whatever thrill they get in bashing other people behind their backs.
Gossip is negative and destructive, causing unnecessary harm and irreparable damage to relationships.
The Bible says, whatever is hidden will be brought to light. (Luke 8:17). The light pierces the darkness and truth is always revealed.
The person who engages in gossip, talking negatively about others, is actually causing themselves more harm than good.
Think about it… if you continued to hear from different sources that someone, whether a family member or a friend is talking badly about you, wouldn’t you distrust and lose respect for them?
An individual who engages in defamation or slander of another person, thinks they are not doing anything wrong, but it’s quite the contrary.
Gossipers cause harm and stand more to lose than gain.
Once the information finds its way back to the person, the gossiper is found out, and well, they will never be looked at the same way. No matter how much they smile and act nice, the damage is done.
If you engage in gossip, whether it is casual or consented, please think twice before doing so. Why not start the new year fresh by asking the Lord to help you not talk about other people behind their backs? I know it’s easier said than done, but gossiping is hurtful and the damage it creates is irreversible.
Do you gossip? Have you ever been a victim of gossip by family members, close friends or coworkers? How did it make you feel?
I Won NanoWriMo!
I haven’t posted in awhile and that’s because I was participating in the National Novel Writing Month, NanoWriMo.
Yesterday morning, I surpassed the 50,000 word mark and won for the very first time.
Honestly, I didn’t think I was going to win when I first committed to doing it. There were a ton of doubts bouncing in my mind.
What if I couldn’t stick to getting up early? What if I got migraines from lack of sleep? What if I couldn’t write 50,000 words by the end of November? What if I couldn’t write fiction?
That was the big one, because truthfully, I never wrote an ounce of fiction in my life. This was my first time attempting to write a novel. I didn’t know what I was doing and quite frankly, still don’t.
However, what I learned by participating in NanoWriMo, is that when I pushed through my fear and took the plunge, I found out I was capable of a lot more than I thought.
I discovered I was wired to create stories and write fiction my entire life and didn’t even know it.
Although, my husband claims to have known, and is my biggest cheerleader.
What a surprise it was for me though. And to think I would have missed out on it if I didn’t try.
This was a learning experience for me on many levels. I had to push through the doubts and determine to do it despite my fear of not knowing how to.
I would have continued to believe that “just showing up” was a cliché by the experts, if I had not experienced it for myself.
Sometimes you don’t need a roadmap, you just have to do it and figure it out as you go.
Yes, it’s scary. Yes, it seems bigger than life when you first attempt it. But if you keep at it, you learn you are capable of much more than you thought.
It’s by allowing yourself to try, that courage meets you on the road of creating.
Writing my first novel was hard, but it was also rewarding. I’m glad I committed to it, stuck with it and won.
I haven’t finished the novel yet, but I developed the habit of getting up early by doing NanoWriMo and I will continue to write every morning until it’s completed.
Overall, it’s been a great experience. I would highly recommend it to anyone who has ever considered writing a novel.
Did you participate in this month’s NanoWriMo for the first time? I would love to hear about your experience.
Follow
embodyart